Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Rudeness

Please be forewarned that this is an unusually long, un-Daesi-like, entry. I'm in a complaining mood today.

One thing that really, really ticks me off is rudeness. Rudeness is vast. Rudeness is unnecessary. But in certain situations and special occasion, the person might have asked for it herself. Or himself. Occasional rudeness. Otherwise, it is really seriously unnecessary.

Like, you know when someone whom you know but don’t really know asks you and specifically you about what you do or what’s your work like or yadda-yadda, and someone else just butts in and answers that for you when you didn’t even need or ask for his or her or any help for that matter (obviously, cuz you should know your own job). I consider that very rude. Because it’s a convsersation between two other people, and if someone is addressing questions to someone else personally, it’s really and I mean really not your territory to kay-poh and talk.

Simply put, mind your own business.

I mean, what kind of impression are you trying to give others by doing that? That they are incompetent? Or that they are incapable of speaking for themselves? Or that you’re better than they are?

If you are indeed smarter or more skillful, people are not idiots and they can tell for themselves. Who are you trying to fool man? If indeed we are the most brilliant being ever walked the earth (maybe rivaled by chimpanzees), we don’t need signboards or loud public announcements to know what we will know as the saying goes, actions speak louder than words. And gloating.

The most appalling fact is that I see people doing that to their friends. Supposedly friends lah I guess. Cuz hey, friends don’t do that to each other! Friends don’t deliberately sabotage other’s reputation or things like that. Man, how can you expect one to like you or consider you as a pal when you’re doing those repulsive things, trying to prove yourself better and stepping on their heads with your dirty shoes?

Another kind that drives me up the wall is what I call 沒大沒小, literally translated as "no big no small" in english. Meaning a younger person / school junior treating an older person / their senior / someone who’s greater seniority in age or rank with no respect or like buddy buddy. I mean, I don’t demand that you kowtow (as in how the Chinese greet their emperor in those days.. kneeling down and ketuking their kepala on the ground) when you see seniors lah. But at the least, regardless of how less intellectually-blessed the seniors or our peers are compared to us, it doesn’t give us the license to treat them like shit.

Be nice lah. If not, what makes one any different from chauvinistic people in those days who were sexist, racist or biased like the caste system? We’ve come a long way since that orthodox system that’s saturated with prejudices and stupidism. Please don’t go back to that Zaman Jahiliyah. For Pete's sake.

Who the heck is Pete anyway?

People shouldn’t be measured or treated according to their IQ. For all you know and I think for sure, their working skills, experiences and EQ could be way greater than yours. People may not have your strengths but they all have their own strengths. There’ll always be someone out there who would be smarter than you. There’ll always be someone out there who would be a better singer than you. There’ll always be someone out there who would be do a better job at laborious kerja kuli than you. There’ll always be someone out there who would analyze problems faster than you... this list is endless. Having humility makes you a gem. Gloating and showing off is just so polar opposites.

I am complaining about no one in particular. It's completely unintentional as I'm just having this mind diarrhea thing going on.. writing whatever comes in my head. If you think I'm writing about you, then oh well, siapa makan cili dia yang rasa pedas. Maybe it's time for a change. And yes, I still want to marah some more.

Only recently I was greatly offended by someone whom I thought or considered to be my good friend. You know this facebook thingy is kinda new, you add your friends and all.. So he wasn't any different. To me lah. And this is what he sent me after he received my friend request...

hey... no need to add me la... I message u tak jawab... leave comment u dun reply... msn messenger u ... no reply... friendster.... facebook... macam sama je... u got like 369 friends of ur friendster & here u got like 50 & counting... nevermind la!! haha.

What in the world is that suppose to mean? If you don't want to approve, don't approve and just click "no" lah. So simple. Do you have to write all those things out like that? It was unnecessary meanness.

Of course, I thought I had to explain myself lah. I hardly come on MSN anyway, and if I do I'm often busy doing work. Ask anybody. I mean, when I don't talk to someone for a long time or just can't reply the MSN message, it doesn't mean I don't treasure their friendship. If we were really friends, you would understand that if I don't reply it's probably because I just can't. There are several friends whom I haven't talked to for YEARSSS. And yet, when we just met up recently, it was surprisingly non-awkward and we could yak as though the last we saw each other was a week ago, instead of 5 years ago. We still consider each other as friends in spite of lack of chit-chatting. And even Keren, whom I rarely speak to online (always poking each other on facebook nonetheless), I consider one of my closest friends still.

Fine. Maybe it's supposed to be jokingly or whatever. But purposely or not, I gather that you're implying I'm just merely adding people to my list, whether they're friends or not. Of which I take great offense. I didn't even know I had 369 friends on friendster in the first place (and I'm not even counting) until then. You think I add people for fun har? Sheesh, man. I didn't know that I am such a cheap and shallow "friend". Thanks a lot for bringing that to light. I'll remember this to my grave. Perhaps engrave the epitaph on my tombstone saying "Here lies Daesi. May she remain cheap and shallow forever".

Smart ass me should have not replied his message. Wasting ATP only. Because all I got in reply was even more of those words. OK. From now on, please do not bother sending private and personal messages to my Friendster inbox. Because I'll never reply any. Because I'll never check it. And because I'll never want to check it. You wanna know why?

This is why.


My inbox is infested with these pests called junk mail. Junk mail. And more junk mail. Hate them. Hate them. Hate them!! Look, I don't care if my love life is gonna be jinxed for the next 10 years or a bloody scary ghost with long pointed and sharp fingernails popping into my room at midnight to eat me up, I will not forward it.

End of commercial :P

Now back to the subject. Where was I? Oh yeah. I don't see what purpose the message serve except that it's just to insult me. Sticking a fine needle into the left side of my chest. So uncalled for. Pretty much say I'm a lousy friend. Oh for goodness sake, you yourself didn't come talk to me when we were at a function months ago! And now this?

You know what, I'm at this point where I really don't give a damn anymore. Misunderstanding or not, I'm through with all this children game. Real friends don't keep count of what you do or what you didn't do to them.

I'm done complaining.


For now.

1 comment:

  1. Ouch. No, I'm not hurting...I'm hurting for you...that's one message that guy sent to you!!! sheesh. haha...even I hardly come on to Friendster..I bet I have tons of mail in my inbox, and not surprisingly, most of them would be junk! lol. ;) I'll be there for you if you wanna let out the frustration and complaints to a person! :) will be going to lab next week only! Have a nice weekend!

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